When I was younger,
My father told me,
I could be anything
I wanted to be.
I believed what he said,
And I lay in my bed,
Dreaming of things I would do
And I’d see.
They were wise words indeed,
Inhibitions were freed
And I found myself able to
Dream big and succeed.
The harder I tried,
The better I did,
But truly the secret to
My success hid
In having someone
Who believed I could do
Anything that I had
Set my mind to.
Pooky's Poems 
You hit the nail on the head Pooky, yes it is so much easier when you have a supporter in your corner. Well done. Another piece of Pooky wisdom.
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Thank you x
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Lovely poem, Pook. My supporter was my husband. He encouaged me in everything, taught me to believe in myself. Having someone who believes in you is a precious gift, one not all children receive.
This poem moves me more with each read. xx
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Your husband sounds like such a wonderful man.. How did you meet him? I don’t think you’ve told me. It sounds like he could see more of you than you could and he helped you to grow into yourself and believe in yourself x
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It was thanks to my sister I met Rod. She wanted to go to a dance, I had just turned 16, hated dances and wasn’t all that interested in boys, but my mother had said she couldn’t go unless I went with her. Anyhow very long story short I told my sister I would go but I didn’t want to dance. She told me I could take a book, there were quiet corners where I could read. Halfway through the night this gentle man with lovely eyes came and asked if he could sit beside me and we just started talking.
He was 21, had just finished his engineering degree and started work. He drove me home, didn’t kiss me goodnight, told me he enjoyed talking to me and said he’d call me. He didn’t kiss me until the third time we went out together. This was perfect for me because I needed gentleness and patience. He was the only man I ever dated. I was sensitive, rebellious, angry, prone to doing outrageous things, and had built a great big brick wall to protect myself from the rest of the world. He was gentle, kind, patient, sensitive, stubborn and very shy. Over the years I taught him to have an occasional walk on the wild side, and he taught me to temper my anger and slowly helped me dismantle my wall with patience and unconditional love.
We had our difficult patches, as most couple do, but with honest, open communication we built a beautiful love over the years. Somewhere I’ve a poem I wrote for our 25th wedding anniversary. I must find it and post it on the blog. It’s titled Out of the Ashes.
My dear Pooky, you ask questions in such a caring way, you take me back in time. When I first read your comment I was sitting here crying because I’m having people for dinner on Thursday night and can’t manage something as simple as setting the table. My sister is coming the day before to prepare things for me, and my friends are all bringing some food. Your question took me on a journey of gratitude and so now not being able to set the table no longer feels like the end of the world.
Thank you
Big hugs
Tricia
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I’m so sad that I will never meet him. Of course, we will meet one day, we have to, but it saddens me that this kind, gentle, accepting soul with whom you shared good times and bad will always be beyond my reach. That said, I feel as though I am slowly getting to know him through your wonderful descriptions. I think that Tom and Rod have played rather similar roles in our lives. It takes someone really rather special to see through the broken layers to what lies beneath, the bits we’d never even seen ourself.
It would be wonderful to read that poem one day.
And as for the table – don’t lay it. Do you think that these people are coming for dinner to judge you on your table laying or to enjoy your beautiful presence and inspiring company. I can make a good guess and I’ve no doubt they’ll take no issue at all with helping to get things ready. Personally, I love it when I arrive at someone’s home for dinner and they give me something useful to do. It makes you feel less in the way and less like you’re being waited on (which is always a strange feeling if it’s a friend doing the waiting). Revel in happy memories and let the table look after itself when your guests arrive. I promise you no one will go hungry for want of the right fork… xxx
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I love this! 🙂
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Thank you x
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Another thought provoking poem for me Pooky.
I am from a generation which was on the edge of change as I was going through high school, and the emphasis was still on getting an ok job (if you were female) until you met someone to marry etc etc. I went to a grammar school which concentrated purely on the elite; unfortunately I wasnt part of that group. So my father suggested I went to secretarial college which I did, and eventually had a very good job working for a solicitor. I stayed with him for quite a few years but when the maternal thing kicked in I gave up work as most of us did back then. 😊
My perception of achievement has always been academic; thankfully this has now changed! 😊😊
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I just have complete confusion about what I should be doing – we have the agony of choice, but every choice is wrong by someone’s book. Working is neglecting your kids, being a stay at home mum is failing to provide an inspirational role model to girls. *sigh* I’m happier now I’m freelancing, I have less money but a far better balance and I’m pretty sure I’ll never wish I’d spent more hours working but I might regret the moments lost with my girls… x
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Its a difficult one for sure. But whatever you do Im sure you will provide an inspirational role model for your girls. I stayed at home all the time but both my girls have full time careers and one of them has two children. She would prefer not to work while they are little but they cant afford for her not to work; its just the way of things these days. Plus her career as a renal psychologist is very important to her. From a financial point of view it was easier for us.
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It’s certainly tougher financially for us lot than for our parents, that’s for sure. Even if I had all the money in the world I couldn’t stay at home all the time. I love my girls but parenting has never come very naturally to me. I love it, I love them but I like the balance that work offers me and it’s always meant we make the very most of family time too. It’s different for everyone I think – I did take a little over a year when the girls were tiny and I forgot all about work and began to wonder if I ever wanted to go back. I do remember feeling like it was an impossible decision and one my husband refused to make for me! (I wanted to be told what to do).
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Pooky, what a lovely reflection. Your poem reinforces that encouraging kids to believe in themselves is so important, especially when as the comments highlight, giving ourselves time to follow our dreams can be challenging!
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Thanks Jacquie – I try to do this with my own kids too.. they’re only little yet it’s so easy to pigeon hole them and already (age 3) imagine them being good at one thing and bad at another. I’m trying to instil in them that there is nothing that they can’t do if they try (which I find being repeated back at me when I make comments like ‘I can’t draw’)
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