Category Archives: Eating Disorders

Ankles Grabbed

Ankles grabbed I’m drowning As I sink into the dirt Ankles grabbed I struggle But the struggle makes it hurt Ankles grabbed I breathe my last And settle in the mud Ankles grabbed I nestle Wrapped in sinew, dirt and … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, depression, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, suicide | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

Dinner Time

Just eating is enough. I tell myself. Maybe it’s the same meal thrice daily, But that’s HUGE! I tell myself. I’ve gone from nothing, Shrinking, Dying. To eating, eating, eating. The same food, With a beta blocker chaser. Finally, it … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

The Chase

The faster you run The faster I hide From the demon You you give rise to Clawing inside Of my guts Of my belly My mind And my head It’s monstrous Preposterous Why can’t you instead Just run slowly Less … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse, anorexia, Anxiety, Bullying, Eating Disorders, Emotions, Mental Health, Relationships, Running, Trauma / PTSD | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Cold

I’m cold in winter, And I’m cold in summer too. So cold that fingernails unpainted Are routinely tinged A ghostly blue. I sit and shuffle, Bones uncushioned, Causing pain. I drop my pen, Spill my black coffee, Once again. You … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Not Yet Good Enough

My best is not yet good enough, I try, and yet I fail, I eat and eat and yet I’m thin, You tell me that I’m frail. I’m frail of body, frail of mind, I don’t know what to do, … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

Parting

It was easy to love you, It’s hard to let go. You’re not good for me, That much I know, How I know. But in your warm embrace, I feel happy And calm Though those watching us Look on In … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse, anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery, Relationships | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Aches and Pains

Your cuddle soothes, And kiss caress My head; My head is such a mess. Your hand in mine, My heart with yours, Into your ear My trouble pours. You cannot help, But listen well( The agony My stomach swells. The … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery, Relationships, To my husband | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Perseverance 

What felt so hard, So alien, Grows easier with time, Practice And perseverance Pay off Until what once felt impossible Is quietly Achieved.

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Mental Health, Recovery | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Fast [Haiku]

Even the best friends Cannot understand. They try; But won’t watch you die.

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Friendship, Haiku, Mental Health, Relationships | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Let me be? 

It’s because you care, And yet you hurt me, Because you cannot love me As I am. You cannot ever know The way it pains me, Knowing I’m not good enough For you. I like the way I am Right … Continue reading

Posted in anorexia, Eating Disorders, Family, Friendship, Mental Health, Recovery, Relationships, Romantic, To my husband | Tagged , , | 1 Comment