You think you know me…

You think you know me,
But you don’t,
You only know my foil.
The girl I choose
To be each day,
In truth, you would recoil.
If you could see
The real me,
The girl behind the mask.
Hiding her away each day
Is a momentous task.
But hide she must,
For fear that you
May see the real me.
For fear that you
Might find you didn’t like
What you could see.
The broken girl,
The cruel girl,
The girl who doesn’t know,
How to be,
And how to act,
I do it just for show.
Behind the mask
The real me
Is scared
And scarred
And shy.
The mask is strong,
Unlike it’s charge,
It doesn’t need to cry.

You think you know me - a poem by pooky

This entry was posted in Emotions, Mental Health and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to You think you know me…

  1. Strong words to carry a powerful theme. After a while, those masks get too heavy and cumbersome. I felt much better after a dropped one.

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  2. This is excellent Pooky, I like that you raise the issue of the masks we wear, depending on the circumstance. Hmmm….something to think about. Great stuff as always.

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  3. Another powerful poem, Pooky. So much is said – but even more is left unspoken…

    Your words and your genuine concern for others gently encourages the removal of masks. One of the things I like best about your blog are the bursts of deeply honest communication. You are a very special woman, and I’m so pleased you deicded to write poetry.

    Tricia xxx

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    • PookyH says:

      Thank you Tricia – these are the ones I tend not to share on Facebook! I do find that when I’m having a momentary dip that getting it down on paper is hugely therapeutic, though I sometimes wonder if I should publish them – but then I think that we should never be ahsamed to own our thoughts and feelings, should we?

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      • I agree, Pooky, we should never be ashamed for being real. And I also understand the not wanting to put some on Facebook, it’s a totally different medium. I still occasionally go through the ‘should I or shouldn’t I post’ on my blog, but both my health psychologist and my grief psychologist (yep, I go to 2 psychologists 🙂 ) encourage me. They refer people to my blog because when we share our struggle it helps others to know they are not alone. Some of the most rewarding comments I get are the ones that never get published. A few people contact me but don’t want their comments published, and I respect that.

        Also I went to a Grief Workshop in July, presented by a wonderful man, Robert Neimeyer, from Memphis University (I think I blogged about him). He’s a poet, author, a working clinician, and a Professor of Psychotherapy. He travels the world teaching psychiatrists, psychologists, and many others who work in the areas of palliative care or grief, how varied the ways of coping with death and dying are. Among other things, he encourages people to use their personal experiences as a learning tool. During the workshop he introduced me, and asked me to read a poem I had just written as part of an exercise we’d been asked to do. When I read this poem about my son, people spontaneously applauded, and at the lunch break some came up and introduced themselves to me, telling me they followed my blog and were moved and inspired by it, even though they didn’t comment. (I have over 100 followers but only a small band of regular commenters). It was really positive for me to meet these people, and now if I’m hesitant I think of them and I post.

        Pooky, when I read this poem of yours I wrote a couple of lines on your blog, but I wrote almost 2 pages in my journal. Also I read every poem you write, often the ones I don’t comment on are the ones that move me too deeply for words, and they’re not always the more serious poems, sometimes it’s the joyful ones that touch the deepest part of me. I’m so grateful that you share some of the hard stuff as well as the joyful. Your words make a difference, you make a difference.

        Think this should have been an email. 🙂
        Hugs
        Tricia xx

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      • PookyH says:

        You’ve no idea how much your words mean to me – and I love to hear the stories of your past. The idea of people applauding your poem because it touched them so is one that makes me smile, a lot, and hugely proud to be your friend..

        You tackle issues that are beyond many people’s understanding or beyond what they are willing to even try and understand. By doing what you do you offer support to those in similar situations and make big strides in breaking down barrier and addressing stigma.

        xxxx

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  4. Another powerful poem Pooky. Im sure there are many people out there who will relate.

    xx

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  5. wbdeejay says:

    Very powerful thought provoking poem Pooky, thankyou so much for sharing it!
    It is a very personal poem to me, as I have struggled with this concept for over 20 years.

    More recently I am coming to understand that the insecurity surrounding these feelings leads to a false idea of who the real me is. The hurt scared shy scarred person within is a true aspect of who I am, but it is also not my entirety. There is so much more of me that is able to comfort that dark part and also be outgoing and strong. This is all me, I embrace it. Because otherwise I wouldn’t be who I am right now.

    Perhaps no-one will ever know or understand the full/real me, and maybe that is not possible anyway. It is up to me to love and embrace all of me, and I am glad that bit-by-bit I am becoming able to do that.

    {{hugs}}

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    • PookyH says:

      We are kindred spirits, you and I…

      I don’t know if I really know the real me. She’s been hidden for so long but I do feel that I’m slowly learning to accept myself more both physically and emotionally. It’s a process…

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      • wbdeejay says:

        I would be honoured to be a kindred spirit 🙂

        As for knowing who we really are, I suspect not many people ever do, so it’s understandable you feel that way. It can seem very sad to know how much you’ve been hiding yourself away. Yes it is indeed a process, so give it time and be kind to yourself. Continue to accept who you are right at this moment, irrespective of the past. And find what brings you joy and expresses you. xx

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  6. Yes, very powerful, Pooky, and very relatable to many, I’m sure…Hugs

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